Why Can’t We Be Friends?

sabrinaGuest Post by Sabrina Cognata

“It sucks ‘cause you’re not here.”
“Obviously,” I hear myself blurt into the phone without thinking.
“It also sucks ‘cause everyone is paired up and the women are generally unfriendly.”
“What? Why?” I know the answer even before I ask the question but I ask anyways.
“Everyone here is on a romantic getaway and the friendly single girl is cramping their style.”
“Being pretty and single, you mean.”
“Whatever,” she sighs with annoyance like a valve shutting off steam. “Last night, at the bar a couple was standing next to me and I started talking with the guy, ‘cause he was next to me and the girlfriend went bonkers and started yelling at him.”
“Oh Lord.”

This is a real life conversation I had with my sister.  She’s on one of those Carnival cruises that sometimes have engine issues and end up drifting afloat as a traveling scat cruise. Since it’s a work trip she doesn’t really know that many people on board. On the first night, she tried to strike up conversation with a couple next to her at the bar; she was confronted with a real life mean girl. I bet she’d have opted for the floating vessel of poo.

Women don’t even want to be friends. I say that as if we were ever taught how to view one another as more than just competition. From the first day of school, women are divided into the pretty, popular girls and the others. If you’re an other, you’re supposed to do whatever it takes to be accepted as one of the popular girls. And if you’re a popular girl, you’ll do anything in your power to ensure the others never infiltrate your social circle.

Some ladies never grow beyond this train of thought, which is a shame ‘cause it’s probably impeding them from tons of amazing adventures with incredible women. Clearly, someone is always going to be on top. There’s always going to be a better-looking, smarter, better-put-together lady out there. So why can’t we just get over our insecurities, ‘cause that’s what this boils down to. If you’re being shitty to a woman because she’s attractive, the problem is inside you and it’s what makes you look and feel ugly.

 But look at it this way, it’s not like our stories all end differently, we die. The ending is the same for every living creature. So why isn’t this reality enough to make you dig deep and be kind to the people around you. To stand strong and support all people, not just women. We have a finite amount of time here and why should we spend it being super bitchy to a stranger who was just being friendly? All you’re doing is missing out on an opportunity to make a memory with someone. Plus, no one wants to steal away your idiot boyfriend ‘cause the reality is he can leave you whenever he wants. If you’d accept that fact you’d probably have a real support group of strong, amazing women when he up and leaves once he’s tired of your shit.


Sabrina Cognata isn’t bad, she’s just drawn that way. When she’s not writing about herself on bathroom walls, she’s living out stories all over Los Angeles. Sabrina worked as a music journalist at CBS Radio, earning her the chance to chill with her rock god heroes. In 2012, she went on to help launch Huff Post Live!, the online interview program the news outlet launched.
Recently, Sabrina completed a stint writing at TMZ where she talked about how she’ll pimp out her cripple status if you buy her a ticket to Disneyland. Her biggest accomplishment to date is being followed by Vanilla Ice on Twitter, which would impress the hell out of her 11-­year-­old self. For more Sabrina, check out her website and hang on.

No Comments Yet.

Write a Comment

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *