Let’s face it, we love our partners more than we love ourselves sometimes. I’m here to balance out that ratio. Here are my five picks to get you loving the shit out of yourself.
When You Wake Up, Thank Your Damn Life
I am willing to bet most of the time when you wake up, before you have breakfast, you are already dreading the day. You are dreading your mirror because of the weight you think you’ve gained or the outfits that don’t look right. I am here to challenge you to think differently in the morning. When you wake up, despite how much crap you are faced with in the following hours, I want you to think about what you are grateful for. Uh, Nina, it’s not Thanksgiving! I don’t care. This must happen in order to improve your attitude about yourself. So THANK your damn life for providing a comfy bed, air condition, Starbucks’ Chai Tea — whatever your little heart desires. It can be materialistic or extremely selfless, but it has to be existent. Recognizing what you already have dilutes the constant anxiety about your daily stressors. That stress is a grain of sand amongst the good that is actually existent in your life. Embrace this through acknowledgement, and embrace it hard.
Kick Your Ass For Twenty Minutes
I used to hate working out like most people, but I’m telling you, there is something about yoga or pilates that boosts endorphins — the kind that gets you to stand in front of the mirror and want to take a million selfies because you look HOT. So do it. For twenty minutes. If you’re more of a nature gal, take a jog. Reward yourself with how great you are going to look the next day because you took care of yourself and taking care of yourself creates a better mentality. Once you are enamored with how well you treat your body, you will attract an abundance of positive energy. You’ll be glowing before you know it. So put whatever reality show you’re watching on pause and do a few thigh exercises (Cassey Ho’s Blogilates is great for a quick fix). Remember, working towards the physical greatly affects the mental. You need to kick your ass in order to befriend your mind.
I am not requiring you to join a cult. I am requiring you to talk to yourself better. Instead of beating yourself up over the food you ate and the workout you didn’t do or the words you never said, try compliments — CONSTANTLY. I’ll have days where I’ll continually chant, “I love myself” or “I am more than enough” and guess what? I feel better. I can hear myself roar. All it takes is a few times during your work commute or lunch break to repeat these powerful phrases. I hate to break it to you, but that soul you have? She isn’t going away, so you need to treat her better. Buy her froyo. Compliment how fine her ass looks. Admit how proud you are that she accomplished the task she set out to do in the beginning of the week. Whatever it is, you MUST consistently recognize the love you have for yourself. It comes before anything (or anyone) else.
For Goodness Sake, Be HAPPY For Someone
Recognizing when others have temporarily defeated the game of life is just as important as recognizing when it happens for us. Initially, we all want to be bitter, especially when our lives aren’t moving at the same pace. It is important to fight against these natural jealousies that come with watching others get closer to what they want. You must congratulate them and literally speak the words, “I am happy for you.” There is an insane fulfillment that comes from feeling happy for others, because it reinforces the good in ourselves. When you feel genuine joy from a friend or co-worker’s successes, your attitude towards life lifts. You are accomplishing the good deed of treating others as humans. Working on the selfless aspect of your soul introduces you to humility, which is extremely important for self-worth.
Stop Apologizing…For GOOD
This goes for the insignificant “Sorry!” that comes out of our mouths when we’ve disappointed someone or did something that was in our best interest. If you fucked up bad, you better be apologizing, but if you go against someone’s projection of you, then that word needs to peace out. We all have different needs. You are traveling through life the way you need to and it requires no apology. Your choices are enough for the experiences you have under your belt. I don’t want you feeling sorry for yourself or comparing how others run their lives. This journey is about learning, and you learn from DOING. You don’t learn from backtracking and apologizing until you have no more female balls. Quit selling yourself short and worrying about outside opinions. You deserve to stand up for yourself and your choices.
There is no greater disservice in life than catering yours to someone else’s expectation. Remember that…and love yourself, darlin’. Love the shit out of it all. There is no other way.Originally published on Honesty For Breakfast.